Topic: New to this

English Alexithymia Forum > General Information

New to this
12.08.2015 by momofpie

I just found out today that Alexi was a thing, I took the test because of an article I read that pretty much described my entire life, I got 134.
I guess it kind of explains a lot, especially about my relationships.
It scares me because I have a wonderful little girl and I don't want it to effect her at all.
So I guess my question is what should I know?
What are my options as far as therapy, treatment, whatever.
Do I have a chance at ever feeling like a human?

16.08.2015 by metalface

I don't really think there is anything.

It kind of depends though, like if this was a recent development caused by some injury or traumatic event. if that is the case it may be secondary alexithymia and maybe emotion can be learned. There also seem to be those who believe simply adding to your emotional vocabulary will allow you to identify things that previously eluded you.

I, however do not put much stock in that theory. But each case is different, maybe something like that would help you. personally, I am content to accept it as a personality trait. It is unlikely it will be "cured" in any way due to the complex nature of the human brain and emotions. It is not a true disorder, and it is not so bad and has several advantages. So your best course of action may be to simply accept it, read up on it, and simply continue with your life as you have been.

Hope this helps

New to this
19.08.2015 by Impulse

I found an article online explaining about Alexi. I'm a college student. I also have been diagnosed with Autism, Depression, and Anxiety. I just took the quiz. I don't know if the quiz results are based on any of these conditions. I wasn't sure if I should consider my personality in this as well. But this does explain a lot about me as well as what I thought I already knew.

Me too.
20.08.2015 by Azashenya

I've also just discovered this, thanks to a friend passing me an article about half an hour ago.

I got 151 on the questionaire.

I spent my childhood assuming it was an English thing (I live in NZ but my father was English and we are similar)
Then early 20s I got diagnosed with ASD, so I've spent my adult life assuming that the lack of connection and understanding with my own emotions (or the existence of them most of the time) was just an autistic thing.

It is going to be interesting to learn more about alexithymia.

21.08.2015 by DXS

What does ASD mean? Is it Autistic Spectrum Disorder? If so, I don't consider autism to be a "disorder." My understanding is just that the brains process differently. Differently doesn't mean "wrong" which is what the word "disorder" communicates.

How to not affect your child
21.08.2015 by DXS

Have to recognize that they may be able to process their emotions and we can't.

22.08.2015 by granny

I was just at the G.P 3 days ago asking for a referral to someone who can help me learn emotions and how to process them (as everyone else seems to be able to do efficiently).
I took the test and scored 151 - not surprised.
She told me of a website on moods to visit,my reply was ' how can I complete a daily mood chart when I don't know what I am feeling'
Can we be taught to distinguish and process emotions- even just a little bit?
If so whose the best professional to ask to be referred to

It's ok to have a name for it,and know i am not on my own- but I need to know if there is a way to be 'more normal'

23.08.2015 by BYO

I have to agree 100% with your post. Have argued this point for at least two probably closer to three decades.

25.08.2015 by metalface

here is the meaning of ASD from

"Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and autism are both general terms for a group of complex disorders of brain development. These disorders are characterized, in varying degrees, by difficulties in social interaction, verbal and nonverbal communication and repetitive behaviors. With the May 2013 publication of the DSM-5 diagnostic manual, all autism disorders were merged into one umbrella diagnosis of ASD. Previously, they were recognized as distinct subtypes, including autistic disorder, childhood disintegrative disorder, pervasive developmental disorder-not otherwise specified (PDD-NOS) and Asperger syndrome. "

Not sure
03.09.2015 by Cephas

I just found out about this condition literally 20 minutes ago, from an instagram picture of all things. An account that posts little known facts.

I took the test and got 149. I was expecting an above average number but not this high. And just as the questions described, I don't know how to feel about this. Sad? Relieved? Still, I know I'm on the brink of tears at the moment but for what emotion?

Either way, how does one go about fixing this? If there even is a fix. My marriage is a little over 3 years in and I feel like I'm drowning. It has been a rocky relationship at best and I know that not ALL of it has been on me, but when it comes to not being able to have emotional based conversations with my wife, that's a bug issue.

In past relationships I have been called cold and distant. I remember one girlfriend pretty much begging me to show her affection and I couldn't understand why she thought I wasn't. She picked a blade of grass from the ground and held it up to me saying, here... I saw this and thought of you... giving an example that she just wanted some kind, ANY kind of acknowledgment that I thought about her, that things reminded me of her. At the time I thought she was being facetious... apparently not.

With my wife I'm trying hard to convey emotions to her and from her... and the only things I'm able to pick up on are negativity. Any slight change in her behaviour or attitude that is not positive, I see... but for the life of me I have no idea the rate of happiness she feels.

We have 4 kids, 1 is biologically mine, and the others, I have earned my right to be called their papa, but with the one that's mine... I notice she has the same general apathy towards things that should make her show happiness. I do my best to try and show her that things in life that make her happy tend to create an emotional/ physical response... she's gotten better. But it comes naturally with the other 3. For her, it seems a little forced and I'm worried now she may fall into the same problem I have

Me too
21.09.2015 by ZI

I'm 15. I always knew I had a problem with emotions and feelings. I have been looking for answers since I was about 7. I stumbled upon this website today and took the test.

My results showed strong alexi traits but I didn't think it was that bad until I compared it with the results of everyone else who took the test today. According to it I am one of the youngest to get tested but with the highest result. My result is 168.

Is it possible to get an official diagnosis or confirmation? I need some answers but I don't know where to look.

I believe it can work for some
25.10.2015 by DXS

There also seem to be those who believe simply adding to your emotional vocabulary will allow you to identify things that previously eluded you.

It took me YEARS to understand emotions, even my own. I am close to 60 and I'm at the point where I can almost be an empath.

But I still don't "get" them. I understand, but don't "get it" if that is possible...

Hello from a journalist
10.12.2015 by alice1987


My name is Alice and I'm a NYC-based journalist in the early stages of researching an article about alexithymia. I'm wondering if anyone here would be interested in talking to me about their experience. The terms of the conversation would be completely up to you-- I wouldn't have to use your name or even quote you. I'd just like to talk. Let me know and thanks so much.