Topic: Why do you get in a relationship

English Alexithymia Forum > Questions and Answers

Why do you get in a relationship
08.09.2015 by Happy13

Hello, i just learned about alexithymia (I scored 141 in the test) and i wanted to know how and why do you get in relationship, i am not saying you shouldn't and it is wrong or anything but i'm close to turn 20 and have never been in a relationship and never try to, i realise it would be good to me to but i just never feel like i want to with any person at all.
And seeing that some people here are married make me wonder why because for me to try to get involved in a relationship there should be a "sparkle" to make me want to try but i never had it.
I am sorry for my english :)

Romance is not logical. Try other types of relationships, or not. It's up to you.
14.09.2015 by panteau

I used to try the whole dating thing, mostly because it seemed like something I was supposed to do. Also, I sought to understand. For the past seven years or so, I've been cohabiting with my best friend and partner in life. Yes, he happens to be the opposite sex, but we sleep in different beds and aren't physically affectionate (although, sometimes he'll try to be, and I'll tell him that there is no logical reason for him to be touching me, and then he'll laugh at me. It's all good fun, I suppose). Anyway, our friendship works quite well because we have complimentary sets of strengths and weaknesses, and we're both rational people. Sometimes, I describe our friendship as a pair of conniving super-geniuses with a business arrangement. That might be slightly hyperbolic, but the point is that we help each other out and take care of one another when we are unwell, and that's why we have a non-romantic cohabiting friend-relationship.

I agree and disagree?? :)
14.09.2015 by Happy13

Thanks for your answer :)
From what i understand it seems to be a strong friendship, but i think from my perspective that beeing in a relationship and cuddling seems nice (it might just be jealousy) but i do not get interested, i will have to fight my social anxiety someday and figure it out :)
But thank you a lot :)

I got into them out of habit....
25.10.2015 by DXS

Here is how "relationships" evolved for me.

A guy would ask me out.
I said "yes" because I had nothing better to do.
He kept on asking me out.
I kept on saying "yes" because I had nothing better to do.
Next thing you know HE is calling it a 'relationship' and I am the one saying, "relationship? What do you mean, all I thought it was, was just 26 dates....."

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