Topic: Therapy

English Alexithymia Forum > Questions and Answers

Therapy
22.12.2015 by CV

Hello all -
I've been considering this alexithymic issue again after another failed attempt at engaging in therapy.
I am autistic so it already creates a sizeable gap between me and a neurotypical therapist, but when I bought up the alexithymic issue and the therapist insisted this could not apply to me because I am capable of feeling any kind of emotion at all, I realized I am not being understood it is time to move on. I get the impression this therapist has given up on getting anywhere with me, insisting that I cannot "intellectualise" whatever situation I am discussing or "apply a scientific method to life." This, however, is all I can do. When the therapist tries to communicate issues he apparently believes relate to me, such as "trauma," I don't understand what he means and we arrive at a familiar impasse. We end up me talking pointlessly and endlessly, and the therapist sitting silently and watching me. Needless to say, this is unhelpful.
Alexithymic or not I still have functioning problems in life, likely to do with autism. After doing some reading I am considering a CBT approach, as it is reputed to be the most effective for both alexithymics and autistics. There appears to be more of a focus on dialogue, learning/information, applying strategies and evaluating the results. This to me seems more likely to be productive than asking me what I "feel" about "trauma."
Has anyone had success with therapy? Which kind, how did it function/what format did it use, and how did you benefit? Also, how to raise these issues with a therapist to see if they can be effective with someone of this type? Is it even possible for therapy to be useful for helping someone with alexithymia?

therapy
31.01.2016 by petermitchell

i'm the 'no feelings'.. i tried emotional intelligence 2.0 [the book] and it had no effect. i tell my wife this is like tone deaf or color blind. born that way. she's not buying it. btw married 44 years

Answer to CV
31.01.2016 by paschal

CV-I participated in therapy for 11 yrs and it helped a lot. It was my therapist and I involved in mutually discussing ways i could improve my interpersonal relationships and the situations and problems in this area that arose in my daily life. We did one hour sessions weekly.

Therapy CAN work
31.01.2016 by FermiParadox

Hello friends & CV in particular,

I have only dealt with a handful of therapists, but I can tell you, so many clinicians get things wrong. They are programmed to operate in very rigid ways. They are taught to keep themselves aloof, separate, "objective", and some of these people take this to the extreme. Yet when dealing with someone with alexi (and autism to boot!) this severely handicaps them. When their client has nothing to tell them, as we alexi/autis often present, they have no idea what to do. They have no idea there are other therapeutic avenues to pursue.

One of the first counselors I ever saw did just what you describe. It was maddening. She kept looking at me like this sad little creature who "must be in so much pain"... I look down at my arms and legs... no, no pain here... I only saw her twice. My next one several years later was a little better, she was personable, encouraging, let me bring up things I felt were out of whack and didn't try to impose any textbook bullshit on me, but she kept herself just a hair too out of touch. I pretty much gave up after that, until 2011 when I was really in crisis mode. I had to move in with my mother after not being able to work anymore, and I hooked up with a therapist here and its been a miracle. She is a miracle. I was going to refer you to the previous topic and my response there, but I've just realized it was you I was responding to. :) This forum plays tricks on us. I will reference it here anyway for other people, some helpful things were said by all in this thread:

English Alexithymia Forum > General Information > Has Therapy Worked for Anyone? I'm tired of faking.
http://www.alexithymia.us/forum_Has+Therapy+Worked+for+Anyone++I'm+tired+of+faking.++.html?topicid=404&pageid=

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